What if we are afraid that in accepting help–much less asking for help–we are admitting to failure?
Today’s card reminds me that we can only give so much. Sometimes we must stop and fill ourselves back up. I see caretakers and parents and teachers and so many others who do,do,do for others and rarely allow others to give back.
“No, that’s okay. I’m fine.”
“Oh I’d rather you gave that to the children, the animals, the planet.”
“Please don’t worry about me. I have it all under control.”
Then I read this quote from Lissa Coffey in her daily Wisdom email.
“We put such expectations on ourselves! And look at the expectations we put on our children, our parents, and all the people in our lives. We are human. We are here to learn. We are going to make mistakes, it’s all part of the process. When we relax our expectations and just go with the flow – approach our challenges as lessons rather than failures – then our experiences in life are more meaningful.”
And I had to wonder if this doesn’t go hand-in-hand with giving and not receiving.
Stick with me…I’ve got a point.
What if we are afraid that in accepting help–much less asking for help–we are admitting to failure? Let’s explore that though, okay?
If I say to you, “I have a toothache, please send Reiki”, do you think, “Oh that Arwen. If she would just brush more/floss more/eat fewer sweets, she wouldn’t need Reiki.”?
Do you think I am a terrible person because I have a toothache?
Yeah. So! Why do you think I or anyone else who loves you would think you were a failure because you lost your job, had a house fire, overspent your bank account?
Sure, if it’s constant, then there is an issue but I don’t think that issue is that you are a failure. And that’s not what this post is about.
This is about learning to stop. Learning to fill yourself up. Learning to say, “I need some me time right now.”
The Sage of Chalices (Queen of Cups) from the Sirian Starseed gazes at an overflowing cup. She relaxes in water and is a part of that water. She knows that by taking time out of nurturing others she recharges herself to go back to that important work.
Important work needs people who know how to stop and refill.
How will you stop and refill this week? Put it on your list and don’t skip over it because of someone else’s crazy. That will wait. You will be of no use to those who REALLY need you if you don’t.
Seek joy, y’all. Pass it on.
A great tool I’m using to help me realize where I need to recharge and refill is this workbook+planner. Do you have yours?
Or maybe you just want to get some of the free goodies she offers. Those are here.
Sage of Cups, Sirian Starseed Tarot, North Atlantic Books 2012