Tag: mama

Why Did I Open That Box?

CelticTreeOracle_SailleSometimes you open a box and get sucker punched. I have a lot of decks. A lot. I am also one of THOSE people who tuck things away without thinking. This means I stumble across things. Things I have no memory of putting in those places.

Happened to me last night. I was perusing my decks trying to decide which one to pull for you today. I saw a box that was unfamiliar. When I got it down, I realized it was my Celtic Tree Oracle by Liz and Colin Murray.

I remember wanting this deck so very much. If memory serves, it was a gift from a dear friend. I used it a bit but never got into it as much as Tarot. It’s a very different system. I do remember that the first card I pulled was Saille.

Saille is Willow. It is lunar rhythms and female aspects. It is also a name I very nearly chose for my Craft name so many years ago. Saille, not Willow. I didn’t choose it for a variety of reasons, but it has always been very close to my heart.

When I opened the box, my stomach and heart swapped spots. I gasped out loud. There was my beautiful sister in her wedding dress. And there were pictures behind that one.

“Steady. She’s going to be in there.”

I said that out loud. I told myself I would be okay. I moved to the next picture to see my sisters and I. Then the next and there she was.

Mama.

Mama about two years before she lost her battle with cancer.

Mama with her short chemo haircut.

Mama with her beautiful smile.

I didn’t cry. I smiled. I realized that I look more like her now than I did then. I realized that her sense of humor is mine. That her smile is mine.

I realized that I am my mother’s daughter.

It also did not surprise me to find Saille as the top card facing up. No, not at all. It also represents February. 😀

Steady. She’s going to be in me forever.

We all have those pictures–in our hands, tucked away in boxes, stored in our memories. The ones that bring that twist of sadness wrapped up in love. As the years go by, I expect I’ll grow to look more and more like her.

Mama. She was my hero in so many ways. Not just the cancer thing. Hell no. Cancer didn’t make her a hero. She was my hero long before that.

For your 180 seconds today, I’m challenging you to tell me who your hero is. Who inspires you and makes you a better person?

For me, it was my mother. That woman was so much to me. I’m blessed to have had a very close relationship with her. I know not all of us are. So who is your hero? Tell me. I want to know.

Because I’m just a bit sad, just a bit raw, just a bit ouchy, I’m going to tell you this again. I love you. It’s important to me to tell you that.

Seek joy, y’all. Pass it on.

Saille, The Celtic Tree Oracle: A System of Divination,1988

Religion, Family & Cabbage

So she didn’t make my religious choice a bone of contention. And she certainly could have. She was a strong woman from some very strong women. In my family, the matriarchs have always stood out.

“Our religion keeps reminding us that we aren’t just will and thoughts. We are also sand and wind and thunder. Rain. The seasons. You learn to respect everything because you are everything.” ~ William Least Heat Moon 1939-

I was blessed with a mother who wasn’t overly religious although she was a faithful woman. She grew up Catholic, then raised my sister and I in the Episcopal faith. She attended the Methodist church with her second husband while beginning her drift back to her childhood faith of Catholicism. She allowed me, albeit regretfully, to leave the Christian path without making it hard on me. She didn’t like it. I know this. I also know that she wanted me to be happy and secure. So she didn’t make my religious choice a bone of contention. And she certainly could have. She was a strong woman from some very strong women. In my family, the matriarchs have always stood out.

My Mama had a German-Scot Mama and a Scot-Irish Papa. While her mama, my Grannilu, was not someone I remember as a good cook, Mama said there were good cooks in her family. She passed her love of starchy potatoes and stinky cabbage on to me with this dish. It’s one she found later in life. Like her, I’m a collector or recipes. I even cook some of them. 😀 She made this for me for one of my homecoming meals and I loved it then as I love it now. Even die-hard cabbage haters will fall for this treat!

Because it’s something I closely identify with Mama, I knew this one had to be a Queen (the Empress was already taken, sorry Mama!). The Queen of Cups might seem like the perfect choice but my Mama was a sharp edged Scorpio. She was funny–brilliantly so at times and almost always pointed and sharp insightful humor. I knew her as a widow most of my life (she remarried when I was in my early 20’s). Her friends were classy, stylish women (when they weren’t being redneck haints). She was a a classy, stylish woman and I adored her. She wasn’t the cookie-baking, soccer mom but she was the take-you-to-the-library, defend-you-tooth-and-nail mom. I’m lucky to have had the time I did with her. So she is the Queen of Swords to me.

Queen of Swords Cabbage Au Gratin

1 head cabbage, shredded
4 cups water
2 tablespoons butter
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup dry bread crumbs (divided)
1/2 teaspoon pepper
1 beaten egg
1-1/2 cup grated cheese (divided)
1-1/2 cup heavy cream
1/4 pound bacon

Brown bacon, set aside

Cook cabbage in water 10 minutes. Drain.

Beat egg, cream and seasonings together.

Layer cabbage in casserole pan with egg mixture and remaining ingredients,except bacon. Reserve some of the bread crumbs and cheese for topping.

Place chopped bacon on top of casserole, dot with butter and bake in a preheated 350° F. oven for 30 minutes.

6 servings

Arwen says: Mama didn’t do the bacon and I don’t either. Just a sodium overload!

I hope you will let me know if you try this. I think I’ll make some this week. If you are Catholic, maybe you’d like to light a candle at Mary’s altar for my mama. Her name was Marilu. 😀 I’ll light a candle on my own altar. Don’t let religion come between you and those you love. It’s really not worth it. Instead, share a meal and a blessing that you have friends and family who care about you enough to worry about you.

Here’s to all of us. We are blessed to have the ability to choose who we call family. “You learn to respect everything because you are everything.” Thanks to William Least Heat Moon for that.