Eights Archives < Arwen, Professional Joy Seeker

Stagnation Makes Me Giddy

Today’s card made me giggle. Then it made me snort. Then it made me laugh until tears rolled down my cheeks.

And you are looking at me with your head tilted thinking, “Arwen, have you lost your mind? There is nothing funny about stagnation.”

I might agree with you if you didn’t know what I know. The Universe is mocking me again.

You see Monday night I did a reading for a young friend. It was her birthday and she is officially a tween now. Her parental units requested it. I was happy to oblige. While I did that reading, her parents unloaded a closet for me.

Close your eyes. Imagine a typical closet with sliding doors. Now imagine it is packed floor to hanging bar with boxes. Now wedge more in. Now realize that you can’t even slide the doors shut because there’s so much SHIT in that closet.

Then walk away from the closet for two, no…let’s make it two and a half years.

Yeah, talk about stagnation, right?

But here’s the thing. That’s not an imaginary demon of a closet. It was very real. And my friends moved all the boxes out.

Now I have to go through and purge, purge and purge some more.

I live in a cute, little condo. I’ve lived in larger spaces. I still have allllll the chit from those larger spaces. So you see where I’m going?

A lot of what I have hung on to has sentimental value. I have a turban and a pair of glasses. Both were worn by my mama during her battle with, and subsequent loss to, cancer.

I have books that took me places once upon a time.

I have Tarot decks that I wanted SO BADLY once upon a time.

Everything in these boxes has been in these boxes for two and a half years. Thirty months, y’all.

Like the chipped and no longer functional bowls in this card from the Vision Quest Tarot, my stuff is clogging me up. My chi is not flowing.

In fact, I think I heard my chi running for the hills.

Operation: Declutter Arwen is on the table. I don’t know how long it will take, but I’m going to do this thing.

Do you have anything that you hang on to that you need to let go of?

I know my mother will be happy to know her glasses are heading off to the Lions to be put to better use.

Eight of Water, Vision Quest Tarot, 1999

But I Don’t Wanna Go To Work!

Today’s card reminds me that I’m lucky. Blessed, in fact. It also reminds me that sometimes I forget this fact. I woke up wanting to call out. Was it because I didn’t feel well? Was it because I was in pain? Was it because there was some fun thing I’d rather be doing?

Nope. None of the above. I simply didn’t feel like going to work. It was just going to be another day of the same old shit. People complaining. Co-workers bitching. Sometimes the negativity at my office makes me want to run screaming into traffic.

So I laid in bed (after calling in and finding out that, once again, there was no time available) trying to reset my mind. What was one positive thing I could find to hold on to?

Then it hit me.

I had a job.

Period. End of story. I have a job that helps pay my bills, put food on my table. I have a job that doesn’t make me do hard labor. I have a job.

And that, y’all, was how I reset my mind. I got out of bed knowing which card I wanted…or at least which suit. It had to be Pentacles since that is the suit of physical labor (as well as other things). And the Steampunk Tarot was what I worked with for yesterday’s weekly Tarotscopes.

I love this card. The task seems endless and mindlessly repetitive, right? Unending. Same old shit.

But our girl has made it her own. She has created each disk with a different flair. She’s put herself into her task. Her focus is on how to make each piece uniquely hers.

I can do that. I can make each interaction with my customers uniquely mine. I can take pride in what I do.

I still may need ear plugs to divert the continual kvetching from so many of my co-workers, but that’s okay. I’m also blessed to have a job that pays me enough to indulge in Bose® QuietComfort® 15 Acoustic Noise Cancelling® Headphonesnoise-cancelling headphones. (I got a deal and found these for $79 on some group thingy last year.)

Find joy in the mundane, everyday tasks today. That’s your 180 second challenge, y’all. Three minutes of acknowledging that what you do for your job is worth it on some level.

And if it isn’t? If there is truly no joy in your job? Use that 180 seconds for brushing up your resume and get the hell out. Don’t be that black hole of negativity that others have to avoid. Please.

Eight of Pentacles, , Llewellyn [aff]

Seek joy, y’all. Pass it on!

Finding Nemo Finds Arwen

Today’s card reminds me of “Finding Nemo.” Well, not Nemo per se but one of the characters in that movie. I know it may not make sense but hang in there. I can explain.

I will refrain from misquoting “Princess Bride” now since mixing movies is only second worst to mixing metaphors.

Still with me? Good! This is the Eight of Water from the soon-to-be-out-of-print Gaian Tarot. It is the Eight of Cups in many decks. Although Powell turns a distinctly non-traditional eye on many cards, here she is true to the meaning.

Leaving things behind.

And, of course, the character I see here is Dory. I see this card and I tell my client that they have started the hard work. Now they must just keep swimming.

Stop for a moment.

What do you identify as “the hard work” in your current energy pattern? What are you actively trying to move away from?

Overeating?
Smoking?
Negative thought patterns?
Paisley?

What ever it is, this card is a reminder that you should keep swimming. Don’t look back. The further out you go, the further you are from that shore. The shore represents that “not so good for you” behaviour or, sadly, person or place.

Now that you’ve refocused on that “hard work”, I want you to give yourself a pat on the back.

Now, get wet.

You know why.

You’ve got to keep swimming, swimming. Just keep swimming.

Seek joy, y’all. Pass it on.

Eight of Water, Gaian Tarot Limited Edition, Joanna Powell Colbert

What Swords Do You Carry?

Today’s card reminds me that I can change my mind. I am not limited to or locked in by what I think. I don’t have to be blinded by my thoughts, you see. The Eight of wands in many decks shows someone blindfolded while walking through a field of swords. Dangerous, that. One really should watch where one is going when one is navigating a “mind”field of sharp pointy things. This is one of the reasons I’m always on about seeking joy, y’all. My personal “mind”field is full of negativity and harsh thoughts–about myself and others. I have to watch the people I allow into my world–too much negativity and they must be moved to an outer ring. That’s how I control my joy hula hoop. I don’t let them in if they are going to suck my joy dry.

Lately I’ve been moving to a focus on the outer me now that I’m happier with the inner me. I LOATHE dieting. I LOATHE the focus on dieting. However, I loathe more the fact that my back is in constant pain. A few things have happened recently that have brought this to the forefront for me. The first was seeing one of my cousins. Last time I saw her (nearly a year to the day), she was a stocky woman showing off our shared German heritage of stocky womanness. This time she was about 1/3 of herself. All she did was eliminate two things from her diet. Sugar and the much-maligned gluten. Yes, it completely changed how she eats but, damn, she looked so good. Not her weight loss. Her energy. Her smile. Same German heritage–just less of it.

Then my best friend told me, yet again, that she would be doing this challenge thing. She’s done it twice so far. So this time, I took the plunge. It’s a 24 Day Challenge where you drink their drinks and take their vitamins. I’m on day six today. It’s working. Period.

I’ve also been focused on walking 10,000 steps a day. I have hit that a time or two. What’s nice is that my weekly average has been going steadily up. Week before last I walked 21.1 miles for a personal best. Then last week (it runs Sunday to Saturday on my pedometer app on my phone) broke that record. The app I use is MOVES (may be iOS only…sorry Droid lovers) and it is free. It keeps me on track because I can see that at noon I’ve only walked 2200 steps so I need to …grin…step it up. But back to the personal best of 21.1 being broken.

You read me correctly. I broke my record. OH YES I DID. 22.5 miles walked. That’s 56,289 steps for 11:09 hours of walking. I’m averaging 8041.25 steps a day. And you know what? I’ve found that walking is something I really enjoy. I hear/see birds. I sometimes visit with other walkers. I love seeing if I can walk just one block more. I take pictures too. And then there are some other bonuses.

Some of those benefits I’ve learned (yes, I’ve read them but never believed them) are that I am far less cranky when I walk. The more I walk, the better I feel. My feet are hurting less (bonus) but it still takes me some doing to get motivated in the morning. I have some pretty impressive blisters too. Right now I’m back to walking in my Birks and switching to my tennis just so my feet have some changes. Oh. There is one other benefit.

I have lost five pounds doing this plus the Advocare 24 day challenge (started that on Wednesday). If you want to do it too, go here to get yours. It’s definitely challenging but it’s working so that’s a good point. The cleanse part isn’t so hard except I really miss dairy. LOL I had a tiny piece of farmer’s cheese that I put in this morning’s omelet. Had to make myself do that instead of the meal replacement shake. Those things are seriously tasty. I loved breakfast drinks as a kid. The chocolate mocha one tastes very similar to those.

One of the drawbacks is the fiber drink. OMG. Just drink it as fast as you can. It’s not NASSSSSSSSSSSTY but it is nasty. 😀 The Spark energy drink has truly done what it says. I am only doing one of those a day. It is tasty as well. I prefer the orange to the fruit punch.

It’s helping me change how I think about things. Food wise I’m eating more salads and focusing on more veggies at night. I’m lucky in that I adore things like cabbage which is very filling. All in all, the new healthy me is doing well. When I’m done with this challenge, I hope that I will have a new idea of how to eat better and control things like dairy and wheat. That’s really my goal. I don’t say diet because it’s not a diet per se. It’s more of a lifestyle/attitude adjustment for me. 😀 That’s why I picked the 8 of Swords. Sometimes thoughts are my worst enemies. I have to control them around food a lot. I have some “issues” around food.

A big one is an empty pantry. Anyone who knows me will tell you I hoard certain types of food. I can’t be without mustard, vinegar and pickles. Yes, I hear you laughing now but having them makes me feel secure. I could have no meat in the house and feel less anxious than when I know I’m down to my last bottle of mustard. It’s like a crisis for me. Same for Tabasco . Funny thing is, I don’t use any of them that much other than the vinegar. Right? Laugh all you want!

Do you have certain foods that have to be in your house? What are they? Or is that not one of your hangups? I think, for me, I will need to remove my blindfold in this particular “mind”field so I can examine it a bit more.

Still, feeling the loosening of clothes? Oh yeah…priceless. I don’t think I’d be seeing these results if I weren’t doing the walking of course. But I haven’t had anything to drink that hasn’t been water. The diet sodas, so I hear, actually work against a healthy life style. No sugar AT all. That’s been super hard. The strawberries with Stevia last night went a long way to helping that sweet tooth issue. Truly that’s my weakness. 😀 So I’m going to the store today to get more fruit. I’ve polished off the quarter watermelon I got on Tuesday. Strawberries are gone. So more fruit to curb Arwen’s sweet tooth. 😀

And more work on my thoughts around food and need. 😀

Seek joy, y’all. Pass it on.

8 of Swords, World Spirit Tarot, U.S. Games

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Three Most Important Things

They are all active and alive and growing. These are things that need to be addressed so I might as well tackle them.

Today’s card is not one I enjoy because of the message it brings. It’s not normally a “bad” card but for me, it makes me cringe. Why?

Because it is a card of necessarily fast action. Things coming at me rapid fire. Generally this happens when I’m tired.

Hmm. Do you think there’s a correlation to things coming at me seemingly too fast when I’m tired?

Yeah. Right.

But look at the wands themselves. All but one of them sports greenery. They are all active and alive and growing. These are things that need to be addressed so I might as well tackle them.

The postitioning of the wands generally make me think, “INCOMING!” Instead of ducking and …napping, I need to have a clear head so I can just get things done. This card, for me, is required multi-tasking.

And I am tired today. I also have a lot to get done. I stayed up far too late the other night and only got four hours of sleep. Last night I was in bed by 9 and asleep before 10. Then back up at 6.

I should have been back up at 5, grin.

Still, if I’ve learned anything in this life, I’ve learned how to multi-task.

Leonie Dawson’s encourages me to write down my three most important things for each day. Yesterday’s were “Stay awake.” “Seek joy.” “Go to bed early.”

What will your three most important tasks be today? Can you commit to one of them being “Seek joy?”

180 seconds is all I’m asking of you at first. Then start adding 60 seconds at a time until your day is filled with an attitude of gratitude for seeking joy in everything.

8 of Wands, Dreaming Way Tarot, USGames 2012 (used with permission)

Seek Joy, y’all! Pass it on.

Beliefs, Ceremonies & Secrets

One of the questions in this closing ceremony was “What dreams came true during 2012?” I came up with four of them right off the bat. The first and second were the most important to me. They were the two that really were the biggest.

Today’s card reminds me to believe in myself. When I listen to what old me says I can’t do, new me gets shut down. That’s no fun! The 8 of Coins is the card of the craftsman. I see it as the cycle of apprentice/journeyman/master. We are all at some point on that scale. Often it depends on what it is we are doing. For instance, I consider myself to be a master at the craft of Tarot reading but an apprentice when it comes to Astrology. It’s all good too. As long as I’m still learning, I’m succeeding. This is a fun representation of this mix of learner and learned in the Fantastic Menagerie’s Eight of Pentacles. Musicians are another form of artist who have an almost continuous learning curve.

My learning curve this past year is not something I really paid that much attention to until I got this planner for next year. If you’ve been paying attention, you know where I’m heading with this post. I’m going to go on and on about the some more, y’all. There’s so much here. I’m not even a quarter of the way through but already, I’ve had an epiphany. I’ll tell you about that epiphany on Wednesday.

The planner begins with an exercise that states as the very first line:

Here’s the place where we muck it up.

My first reaction? “Well that’s just not very nice, Leonie!” But, I’ve been a member of her site since June so I thought I might want to read on for one more sentence or so. Then I saw phrases like “taking stock” and “celebration + release” and “closing ceremony.” My fears were assuaged.

1. I created art.
2. I changed people’s lives.

Now those may seem fairly disparate or maybe even super out of balance in terms of importance. I suppose I could have lied to y’all and said that the second was the first and the first was the second, but well, that’s not true. That first one is a doozy for me.

I’ve shared some of my Zentangles here and there. The responses I’ve gotten have fed my soul in a myriad of ways. I get a bit choked up when I try to verbalize those ways. Art is one of those things I always thought wasn’t in the cards for me. I figured I was good to be able to write poetry and stories. My writing partner is an artist. She’s so talented that sometimes I felt a wee bit jealous of her.

Then two things happened. One was the Leonie Dawson Creative Goddess course. The other was Joanna Powell Colbert’s seasonal practice (I took the Lammas one). Both are online courses. Neither forces you to a strict “do it or you suck” time table. Both had these amazingly supportive souls on the same journey with me. Many of them were already visual artists. I was so intimidated when I saw their first pages of THEIR art journals. Mine looked like something a child (a really untalented one) might do. Goddess. It was excruciating to share my pages. But I did.

Then while I was doing that, I heard about, stumbled over, ran across Zentangle. And boom. I took a class (had to set multiple reminders on my phone that basically said “You paid $35 for this. Don’t back out.” And other *ahem* self-motivational admonishments. When that Sunday came, I was still looking for a way out including a mild wish to be hit by a bus. What was I thinking? Me? Doing art. HA to the HELL NO.

But I did. And I did. I mean…I did! I created things that were pretty. I showed my best friend who immediately dove in as well. She’s doing them as well. Zentangles, for me, have been a way to quiet my mind which helps my creativity.

Then there’s that second piece. That big, ballsy phrase about me changing people’s lives. I hesitated before I put that one down. It’s not one of those throwaway statements. But I’m going to talk more about that tomorrow.

Want to join me on this planner journey I’m on? I have a Facebook group (it’s seeeekrit). Let me know you’ve . I’ll give you the Seeeekrit code and, if you join by midnight yesterday, you’ll get the Seeeekrit Decoder Ring and the Super Seeeekrit Ranger Necktie too. (grin).

Seek Joy, Y’all! Pass it on.

8 of Coins, Fantastical Menagerie Tarot, The Magic Realist Press

Thoughts, Swords & Purviews

The Universe frequently knocks my noggin, yanks the rug out from under me feet, or yanks my pigtails then runs.

Today’s card was pulled at a perfect time for me. See, I am furious right now. Just sick with anger about a news story that I read. I’ve already kneejerked about it on my personal page. I’ll spare you that here.

What I will say is that the 8 of Swords (Fenestra Tarot, US Games) is the perfect knock upside my noggin from the Universe. The Universe frequently knocks my noggin, yanks the rug out from under me feet, or yanks my pigtails then runs. (FWIW, I don’t have pigtails… :D)

When I looked at this, I didn’t see swords so much as bindings held by others that locked this woman into place. Of course, those are swords but not for me, not now. My fuzzy eyes have locked onto that idea that she’s held captive by others.

Swords are thoughts. Swords are mental actions. Swords are controlled by…????

Ourselves.

Our thoughts are completely within our own purview. So those swords in this card? Not in someone else’s hands. They are emanating from her and being PUT into the hands of others.

Yep, she’s giving them control of her thoughts. I do that. I forget to stay fierce about my joy. I forget to deny outside input into my interior landscape. I plant thorns when I should be planting tulips.

I can’t control others.
I can control myself.

Yep, it’s that simple. If, and only if, I keep fiercely focused on that finding. (Yes, you can assume adore alliteration.)

So today, my job is to reset my mind, to reroute my thoughts, to restore my inner landscape. Yes, the newsstory was horrific. Yes, there is something I can do about it (educate others on what I think the cause is). But no, there is no reason to walk around jacked up about it all day. What good will that do?

And, in a lovely bit of synchronicity–Thanks, Universe– I read Jodi Chapman‘s blog today.

Yes. Be nice to myself. This is what I must do. And I shall!

Will you?

8 of Swords,Fenestra Tarot, US Games, 2005

Seek joy, y’all. Pass it on!

Still plenty of time to join the gang who are going to be using C to make 2013 the best ever.

Volunteering, Weeping & Control

Today’s card reminds me that sometimes joy is hard to seek. It’s hard when you feel as if the world is dead-set against you ever breaking free of things. It’s hard when you feel as if no one truly cares about your forward progress.

So what do you do when you feel like the 8 of Swords? This card is from the Fradella Adventure Tarot. It’s a particular favorite of mine–this depiction. I was reading with it one day when it hit me.

She’s not a victim. She’s not on that wheel at someone else’s hand. No. She volunteered for that position. She trusted that the thrower would hit the target and not her.

But the important piece is…she put herself there. Look at her. She’s no simpering, weeping miss. She’s a strong confident woman who knows how to take what life throws her way. She knows it’s only a matter of time before she is free again.

She knows that even when someone is throwing blades at her, she is in charge.

Don’t let life win. Don’t give into the “it’s not fair” and “they are all mean to me” mode of thinking. Rise above that. You can’t control others. You can only control yourself. Don’t give them the pleasure of seeing you falter.

Keep. Seeking. Joy.

Here’s a great quote from Robert Louis Stevenson.

“…Find out where joy resides, and give it a voice far beyond singing. For to miss the joy is to miss all.”

To miss the joy is to miss all. Wow. That quote in one of my Oprah newsletters really swatted me hard. I’ll bet this woman strapped to the target knows where her joy resides.

It isn’t out there. It isn’t in the hands of the knife thrower.

It’s within her.

It’s within you.

Find out where joy resides, y’all. Pass it on.

9 of Blades, Fradella Adventure Tarot Deck & Book Set with Book(s), USGames, 2003

Hurry, Rush & Validate

Do I have so little faith in my community? Do I think their attention span is so short? Well, to be honest, in a way I do. But it’s not that…

Today’s card is a reminder that not everything has to be fast. This cartoon from Bill Holbrook’s “On the Fasttrack” made me smile in wry acknowledgment. I feel this pressure. I must be present. I must be heard. I must be read.

Then I realize it’s because I don’t want to be forgotten. *thud* That’s so much bigger to me than simply being heard. What if I am Continue reading “Hurry, Rush & Validate”

Musings: With Eight You Get?

So I’ve been thinking about eights more. I once learned that four is the number of stability and work. So for me, eight is the number of either a lot more stability or a lot of conflict. It is also about hard work. One thing that occurred to me is the shape. On its side it is an infinity symbol. If you consider that each half of the infinity symbol has four points, then when the two overlap, one point is doubled in the center.

If you put yourself as that center point, you can see that you are the fulcrum between those two circles. Depending on which way you go, the balance will be shifted. Of course you could stand in the center for ever I suppose. But I doubt any of us could. In the Major Arcana, eight is often Strength. It makes the most sense to me in that you have to be strong to make a choice. Even a bad choice still takes strength to make it–not to mention strength to fix it!

For me, all the eights can be seen as some type of Continue reading “Musings: With Eight You Get?”

1. I created art. 2. I changed people’s lives.

1. I created art.
2. I changed people’s lives.