Wrong Answers, Intuition and Growing Up

When the cards don’t give us definitive answers or the answers we want, we are generally asking the wrong questions.

Someone wrote to me for some advice. They had done a spread I designed on how to choose between two romantic interests. The card they got was not a clear-cut answers. I wanted to chat about that with you today.

Based on all the movie and literary references we have to Tarot readings, it can be hard to fathom that the Tarot is actually not the best for yes/no answers. I’ve talked about this before in a post titled “Tarot Begs The Question” where I laid out how to phrase your question. The basic thought there is that you want to get the most answer you can.

Now many of us want easy answers. We want to be spoon-fed our decisions and choices in life. I have to wonder why that is. Did we all grow out of that rebellious, pouty teen stage where no one had the right answer but us? Do we forget those James Dean moments of life where we thrust out our chin to declare no one was “the boss of me”? So why try to put the Universe in the role of parent?

In a word, grow up.

That may sound harsh but consider this. If you constantly want someone to tell you what to do, how much power are you giving away? Sure it’s to the Universe, but don’t you think you need to take a tiny modicum of self-responsiblity here? Aren’t you capable of listening to your own intuitive self?

What? I’m not intuitive!

Who says? Who told you that you are not intuitive? Well? I’m waiting? Yeah, that’s what I figured. Either yourself or some well-meaning, most likely family member that you trusted, right? Well get over yourself, darlin’. You are as intuitive as the next person. All intuition really is, when you strip away everything else, is the ability to listen to your instinctive self. That is the part of you that gets upset about going to a party but you go anyway only to get arrested in the police raid that occurs.

Okay so that’s a bit dramatic, but you know what I mean. You felt like you shouldn’t go but you did anyway. Now there’s a fine line between that gut instinct and just being shy so those of us who are deathly shy (yes, actually, I am) have to determine when it is instinct and when is is social anxiety in those cases.

But back to making the Universe your parent. Do you really mistrust yourself so much that you can’t decide to go out with Debbie or with Tommy? Do you really need Tarot cards to tell you to quit the job with the soul-sucking boss?

A good Tarot reader will tell you that the answer is almost always in the question. So when you are forming your questions, revisit them before you shuffle your cards. Review what it is you are looking at. Then consider rephrasing your questions again.

Here’s an exercise for you.

Think of something you want to know the answer to. For me, it is why I am single.

So I might think a great question was:

What does the Universe want me to know about finding love?

But you know what? I know the answer to that. Get out more. Meet people in real-time. Interact more. Common sense really.

So maybe a better question would be:

How am I blocking myself from allowing love into my life.

See how those are two similar yet different questions? I might get a great answer to the first but unless I answer the second, the first will never happen. Which leads me back to the beginning of this post. When the cards don’t give us definitive answers or the answers we want, we are generally asking the wrong questions.

So what are the questions you want answered? What do you think a better question is for that?