What about you? What do you think your family thought you might grow up to be? What did you want to grow up to be?
Today’s affirmation is based on this quote from Joseph Campbell. “The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.” How many times have you tried to squeeze yourself into the wrong place? Tried to alter how you thought, felt, looked in order to fit in?
I think it’s fairly natural to do this as a child. We want to feel safe and secure so we try to get with/go with the crowd. We don’t want to stand out. We intuitively know (or are taught in unpleasant ways) that being different makes us targets.
Then we hit those teenage and young adult years. High school and college can be a time of trying out different approaches. Maybe seeing if we really are rebels. It’s about testing ourselves against our own images of ourselves–and maybe the images our families have of us.
I imagine my family thought I would be married with grandchildren at my age. I’d have most likely been a teacher or maybe a librarian. I should ask them sometime what they imagined I would grow up to be.
I’m fairly certain bisexual, Wiccan, psychic wasn’t on that list.
[Tweet “What do you think your family thought you might grow up to be?”]
What about you? What do you think your family thought you might grow up to be? What did you want to grow up to be?
Strangely? I wanted to grow up to be a writer. My family probably saw that one coming though. HA!
I think this Four of Wands from the Housewives Tarot by Quirk Books captures this! She’s risen above it all but she’s supported by those mops because that’s the work she’s done!
I revel in my privilege of being who I am. I accept that my path has brought me from my family’s image of me to my image of me. I hold my connections to my past with gentleness and love. I release any hurt from that past. Loved and loving, I love each of you.
Remember that disengaging isn’t running away–it can be a safety valve.
[Tweet “Remember that disengaging isn’t running away–it can be a safety valve.”]
#affirmation Sometimes the Tarot is scary. That’s just all there is to it. Today’s blog challenge was to discuss invisible illnesses. I picked up my phone to look at my Tarot apps.
Using the simply gorgeous Ghosts & Spirits Tarot, I tapped it open. The app is set up so that you get a card right away. I got the Four of Swords. Scary, Tarot. Scary!
A more perfect card for this subject I cannot imagine. Here we see a figure who has vines and branches growing from her head to create what looks like a briar hedge.
One sword is a beam of energy that comes from the one spot of light to pierce her. The other three swords lay beneath her but she can’t seem to reach them.
I have an invisible illness. One that isn’t always so invisible when I have to use walls to walk. That’s my back. I joke about it. I keep it light. I tell people that my back has taken a vacation without me. But it hurts. Oh it hurts.
I am exercising now to lose weight. That will help my back in the long run. I am also doing Reiki with a dear friend, Michelle. Her business is Happy, Healthy Life. I recommend her!
One of the main things about the Four of Swords is that it can be a reminder to let our minds rest. That disengaging isn’t running away–it can be a safety valve.
When I am mentally stressed and in physical pain, like most people, I turn into a grouchy bear. I used to lash out because it made me focus less on my own pain. I’ve curtailed that now because I honestly didn’t like that woman I’d become.
I like me now though. I really really do. I’m still in pain. It’s a rare day that i don’t have some pain. So I exercise. I’m going to be adding in yoga to my routine. I’m going to continue to learn to live with chronic pain.
So here is today’s affirmation.
Today I embrace my need to withdraw. I honor the solitude that brings me relief. I open up to the opportunities to disengage more. I create space for my own needs. Loved and loving, I love each of you. Seek joy, y’all. Pass it on, please.
Sometimes we think more about what we want than about what we have. I am at the mercy of the advertising world as the next person. Instead of enjoying the phone I have, I think about the phone I want.
In the Four of Fishes in Beth Seilonen’s Bleu Cat Tarot from Schiffer Mind, Body, Spirit, we see a cat looking at the fish heads in the three bowls. He’s not thinking about all the meat left. He’s thinking about all the meat that’s gone. Nor does he pay attention to the incoming bowl full of fish.
I am a firm believer that we have power over our mood. There’s a great quote that says “There are seven billion people in this world. Don’t let one ruin your day.”
Now don’t get me wrong. There are going to be moments of sad, of angry, of disappointed. But don’t make your whole life about those moments. Let your life be about the moments in between those moments.
[Tweet “Which moments are most important to you? Why?”]
Yeah, I get it. It’s not easy to do sometimes because it feels like those moments take over. But it comes back to choice. Which do you choose? Fight for your happy, your calm, your peace. Set up boundaries with signs that remind you that you are in charge of your own joy.
Be joy seekers y’all. Put that forward as the most important thing for each day. Professional joy seekers work at it. We make it our number one goal. Make it yours too. Together we can make it.
Today I choose joy. Today I accept that anger, sadness and fear pass as easily out of my life as they may into my life. Today I choose joy. I own my own happy. I am a professional joy seeker. Loved and loving, I am love.
During the working, the small Goddess statue (it’s of Ishtar) came to life. Yes, I know how strange that sounds, but there I was with the Goddess smiling at me and nodding Her head.
Today’s card is one of those moments when I have to whine, “Mom! The Tarot is mocking me again” but also when I must tell you a tale of true magic. Why? Because last night in a truly lovely sacred space created by Nancy Antenucci and Ellen Lorenzi-Price, a group of us all drew for the same reading. In those various posts, I kept seeing one particular card. I thought to myself, “Self! We need to look that Goddess up.” And looking her up reminded me of a spell that went really really well.
Today, I shuffled the Dark Goddess not even consciously thinking about last night. No, my thought was “Tell me what I need to know for today” and boom. There she was. Kamui Fuchi (Kamuy Fuchi) stared back at me. And y’all? I was just going to shuffle the cards one more time when I saw her.
The face that can’t be denied looked back at me. I’ve seen Her once before.
I read up on Her a bit this morning which is one of the reasons this post is a bit late. OOH SHINY and down the research hole I go. But back to Kamui Fuchi whose full name is Apemerukoyan-mat Unamerukoyan-mat said to mean Rising Fire Sparks Woman/Rising Cinder Sparks Woman according to the never-wrong Wikipedia. 😐
One thing I read is that She is so important that she never leaves her home. Another thing I learned is that the hearth is considered a gateway to communicate with the kamuy or Gods.
I love the image in this card. Her rising up from the fire. All of the others below Her. What a lovely thought to be able to sit before your own home fire to communicate with the Gods. That’s when I remembered my spell that went really really well.
I’ll tell you this story about this working. It seems apropos. This was back in…96 or so. I lived in Georgia. I’d quit a job that was sucking the life out of me. I needed a new one. So I did what any witch would do. I worked magic to call the right job to me.
I won’t go into how important it is to tell the Universe what you want and to be hope to what you get. The Universe doesn’t always see things the way you do so your pony might be a Mustang. 😀
During the working, the small Goddess statue (it’s of Ishtar) came to life. Yes, I know how strange that sounds, but there I was with the Goddess smiling at me and nodding Her head. No words, just movement. I remember thinking that maybe I’d fasted a little too long. Then I just asked Her to help me find the right job for me. She smiled and nodded again, then went back into statue form.
The next day I saw an ad for a job for a new company. I was in NO WAY qualified but it was something I wanted to do. So I sent in my email with resume attached.
Then I kicked myself for forgetting to turn off my tagline program. Anyone remember those? They randomly generated from lists you created? Yeah.
I’d just sent an email off for a technical job (again, not qualified for) with a tagline that said, “Hardware: That part of the computer you can kick”.
When I got the call for the interview, the woman mentioned that tagline. She said that was WHY she pulled my resume aside and WHY I got the interview.
I subsequently got the job. And it is still to this day one of my favorite jobs ever. I moved from rep to manager in six weeks and my office was the first satellite to achieve a 40k month.
But that all came from sitting in front of my candle flame and talking to the Gods. Now I know why Kamui Fuchi drew me so hard last night. I’d met Her before but not known Her name. In either this or another working in the same time period, I also met a Kitsune. But that’s a story for another day.
Journal prompt today is, “When have I asked for one thing and received another from the Universe? What was my lesson?”
If you choose to do a working, please remember to phrase it so it is open. Don’t ask for a pink party dress. Instead ask for the right outfit for you. [Tweet “The Universe isn’t keen on being told what it thinks…”]
Today’s card is a hard one for me. I’ve been this person. The one overly focused on what I don’t have. What I can’t have. What is so lost to me. I’ve been stuck in the grief of the loss.
Here with her hands on her hips is the Dreaming Way‘s Four of Cups (USGames). Her bangs hide her eyes. Her hair swings forward to cut off her peripheral vision.
Oh if she would only lift her head up for just one moment. Then she might catch a glimpse of the cup behind her. The one being filled from a Universal well. The one that has everything she could want and more.
How do you get someone unstuck from that spot? I have known people who I call YesButs. The ones who listen to any encouragement, any pointing out of the small joys and goods and respond, “Yes, but…”
Then they list their litany of woes and sorrows and pains.
I am absolutely not saying that we don’t have woes and sorrows and pains. Not even!!!
I am saying that dwelling on them KEEPS us there. That the energy we give to things in our life is the food they need. I don’t just believe…I KNOW FOR A FACT that focusing on the small good, the little joys works.
If you’ve ever been a parent or a pet owner, consider the idea that you focus on the right behaviour and praise that. You don’t over focus on the wrong–that’s time for a simple, direct correction. Then you move on.
Then you move on, y’all.
Many of us aren’t moving on. Why? Is it fear that the cup we don’t see will be spilled too?
You know what? It’s okay if that happens because there is always more where that came from.
The Universe wants us to be happy. Happy children make the world better.
Be a happy child today. Don’t be a YesBut.
Your journal prompt is this. “Where do I get stuck? Where do I lose my peripheral vision?”
Today’s card is an interesting interpretation of this card. Here we see a figure resting. But they are balancing on four swords. In this reinterpretation of the Thoth style Tarot, I see someone who is actively and even intently resting.
A bit of a dichotomy, yes?
But think about it. Sometimes what is restful to you isn’t restful to someone else. Like I don’t listen to music to relax. I listen to music to clean the house.
I read to relax. I listen to an audiobook for some down time.
This person apparently does danger yoga for their quiet time.
Your journal prompt for the day is, “What truly relaxes me? What makes me feel rested and refreshed.”
And when theme repeats itself like this, it may be time for me to take a break for a bit. If I do, I’ll let you know here.
Four of Swords, Sun And Moon Tarot, U.S. Games Systems 2010
Today’s card is from a deck I saw online and HAD to have. Why? Well this card is one of the reasons. I mean…dragonfly swords? What’s not to love about USGames Tarot of a Moon Garden?
While I am mad for dragonflies (have one tattooed on my arm!), they are not what pull me into this card today. No. The first thing was the knight’s helm. Empty. But where was the knight? I saw the unicorn with the interesting interpretation of what seems to be the Eye of Ra.
I saw a piece of armor on the other side of the unicorn. Then I realized that it was two leg pieces. What’s more? Those weren’t empty.
I tracked back to the unicorn and then I saw him, or her. Leaning against the unicorn, is a knight who has just had enough of the battle.
Taking solace in his companion, our knight rests. His sword is ready if he needs it, but for now, he rests.
I am reminded that I don’t rest enough. I don’t take down time as often as I should. I work 8 hours (9 if you include lunch), then come home to do readings, work on the blog, write, take care of the animals, the house.
Now I don’t think my life is all that unusual, darlings. We all live a busy life. But sometimes I live it as if I’m a paratrooper on a plan with a jump master screaming, “GO GO GO” in my ear.
I have to wonder if that is necessary. Today I have a full schedule. Part of that is chatting with someone about cleaning my place for me. Having that off my plate would be nice. And she is an organizer to boot. So I’ll be talking about that as well.
We all need the right kind of rest. What is your “right kind?”
That’s your journal prompt for today.
“What is the right kind of rest for me? What makes me feel refreshed?”
Today’s card reminds me of a phenomenon that often happens when I read for multiple people. Tuesday night I worked a launch party for a liquor brand. They had a Ghosts & Devils theme so we were asked to dress up as Romany aka gipsy readers.
Over and over, I saw the same cards but the one that showed up the most was the Four of Swords. Seemed that a lot of the people in front of me were burning the candle at both ends. Of course they were all young enough to look slightly abashed when I told them the year I started reading. Most of them hadn’t even been born yet.
But, as always, that card had meaning for me as well. I had gotten up at 5am then worked a full 8 hours to come home just in time to pack and shower for this gig. Then I was there from 7:30 until 11:30. I did not get up from my table from 7:45 until 11:15. Kid you not.
I finally had to disappoint a few folk but just declaring that I was cooked. I got home in time to say hello to Wednesday as I fell into bed about 12:30.
Then I was back up at 5 to work again. Now it is 8:30pm as I write this. I’m posting this then guess what I’m going to do? Yep, you betcha! Bedtime. Maybe a tangle but bed is the most important thing on my agenda right now.
For your 180 second challenge today, what are your warning signs that you are overloading your system? How do you know when you need to schedule a serious time out?